


In lust and love

by boleyn13



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Falling In Love, Gen, Love, Lust, M/M, Short One Shot, Unrequited Love, Unrequited Lust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-14
Updated: 2020-09-14
Packaged: 2021-03-07 03:54:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26466766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boleyn13/pseuds/boleyn13
Summary: Loki had been interested in and attracted to various people over the course of his life. So many times he had been in the mood to get close to somebody, to kiss them, to sleep with them. After all Loki was made of flesh and bones, he had urges, needs and he got tempted. Still, he had never lusted after anybody.Until now***All his life Tony had had trouble letting his guard down. It had always been this way, he just didn’t connect with people, he didn’t seek anybody’s company. Until now that had worked out perfectly fine for him.Then this goth Asgardian had shown up and had changed everything.
Relationships: Loki/Tony Stark
Comments: 20
Kudos: 106





	In lust and love

**Author's Note:**

> Just a short one ;)

Lust was anything but an unfamiliar feeling to Loki. Over the course of his very long life he had never learned the art of being humble. Denying himself things that seemed desirable to him was something that he hadn’t yet mastered. Not that he planned on ever doing so. Notwithstanding his sometimes cold and offish demeanour, Loki was a passionate creature. His entire being had been set on fire more than once by a craving burning so intensely that it had threatened to consume all of Loki.

Generally Loki liked to think of himself as a man of refined taste, although the things that he had lusted after up to this day hadn’t been especially out of the ordinary. Knowledge and power. One blended into the other. Nothing had ever excited Loki in a similar way. When he had still been a lot younger Loki had yearned to obtain all the knowledge in the entire nine realms. It had come as kind of an existential crisis when he had had to realise that such a feat was unachievable.

As long as he could remember Loki had sought ways to gain dominance over other people. Mainly he tried to get there through being smarter, more educated. Every single time when Loki succeeded in outwitted somebody or in making them feel stupid in comparison to him, there came a warm, pleasant tingle with it. A sensation of satisfaction that was hardly comparable to anything else. Loki was lusting after it.

Years later, after the painful realisation that brains almost never got the same appreciation as muscles did, Loki developed an appetite for actual power. All forms of it. Magic, political influence, personal connections and so on. Loki had always been yearning for a way to put himself at the top of the social pyramid, because that was where he belonged and because of how it made him feel. A rush of excitement that was not quite enough to get addicted to it, but a life without it would be plain and pointless.

Power and knowledge. People had never been able to provoke the same reaction. Not these tingles, such an accelerated heartrate or the sheer _want_. Especially not when it came down to sexual relations. There had never been actual craving. In the depth of Loki’s mind he couldn’t locate a single memory of actually being overcome by desire for somebody. Sure, Loki had been interested in and attracted to various people over the course of his life. So many times he had been in the mood to get close to somebody, to kiss them, to sleep with them. After all Loki was made of flesh and bones, he had urges, needs and he got tempted. Still, he had never lusted after anybody.

Until now.

The way his body and mind reacted to the sheer presence of Tony Stark couldn’t be described with any other word than lust. Minutes passed as quickly as seconds whenever Loki got an opportunity to watch the Midgardian fulfil the most mundane tasks Loki could easily get lost in superficial details. Since the moment he had seen the other one in his workshop Loki could not stop thinking about his perfectly shaped arms, usually hidden beneath long sleeves. Stark had resembled an ordinary blacksmith as he had been working with iron and steel, only wearing a black tank top. Now Loki was unable to stop thinking about what it would be like to trace these muscles with his fingers or lips. The slight layer of sweat made the prospect only more seductive.

Loki should be ashamed to be a victim of such primitive thoughts like ordinary men, but he couldn’t bring himself to feel bad when very fantasy left behind the most exciting tingle. It made him feel alive just like the idea of ruling over all these pathetic little creatures that couldn’t live up to his standards.

Being so taken in by another’s physical appearance should have already been enough, but Stark’s dry and sarcastic wit had an equal effect on him. Whenever Loki witnessed him slagging off another member of the Avengers, sometimes even without them noticing because he was just too quick and too clever, Loki couldn’t stop himself from biting the inside of his lower lip. Otherwise he would have made a very suspicious appreciative sound.

Everything about this is new to Loki and he is enjoying it. The novelty of it all. To get out of this constant state of agitation and daydreaming Loki would only have to go after the other one. Stark’s reputation that he wouldn’t refuse. Then Loki would find out if the reality of touching Stark, sharing needy, breathless kisses with him, entwining their heated bodies could live up to his fantasies.

Loki had never lusted after somebody and to him it seemed like he had been missing out.

***

Tony Stark would love to be able to claim that contrary to popular opinion he was indeed no stranger to caring about people. Truth to be told, Tony had always felt more at ease interacting with a robot or an AI than with an actual human being. That didn’t mean in any way that Tony was socially awkward. Hell no, everybody who had spent more than five seconds in a room with him would be able to testify under oath that Tony Stark was one of the most charming people they had ever met. Also a sarcastic, arrogant piece of work, but nevertheless charming as hell.

On a surface level Tony could make conversation with anybody, but nobody ever got really close to him. It probably wasn’t their fault. Tony held everybody at arm’s length. It was just something that he always had done and he found himself unable to change it. Because nobody ever got close it was remarkably easy for Tony to let people go. They walked out of his life and Tony forgot about them. There wasn’t anything mean-spirited about it, at least in Tony’s mind.

Rhodey and Pepper were somewhat the exception from the rule. Merely because they had turned out to be so much more stubborn than everybody else. They had stuck around and Tony had become used to seeing them around. He had known Rhodey forever and Pepper was blessed with a ridiculous amount of patience. Yes, Tony did care about them, but he couldn’t pretend like it hadn’t taken a long time to get there. Because of the weird way he was wired.

Even with them Tony had trouble letting his guard down. It had always been this way, he just didn’t connect with people, he didn’t seek anybody’s company. All his life that had worked out perfectly fine for him.

Then this goth Asgardian had shown up and had changed everything. Honest to God, Tony had no idea how this had happened. With a gun to his head Tony wouldn’t be able to name what made Thor’s brother different in this regard. From the moment they had first exchanged words Tony had been fascinated and not just that. Tony was experiencing rather strange and unfamiliar feelings. A fierce need to take care of another human being. Asgardian. Whatever, that wasn’t the point.

At the oddest of times Tony found himself wondering if there was anything Loki needed. Tony had heard him complaining about the fact that he had always cold hands. So, what did Tony do? Go online and look for the most fashionable pair of tight, black gloves that he could find. Of course he didn’t order them, because what he could he possibly tell Loki. _Thought of you while working on my suit?_

It didn’t stop at something as simple as gloves though. No, when Thor and Loki ended up fighting, which happen rather often than not, Tony had noticed that expression in Loki’s eyes. The one of a hurt man who would prefer dying to admitting than a fight with his brother could emotionally get to him. Whenever Tony thought of that expression he was unable to get any work done. There was nothing else on his mind but how to make this easier on Loki.

If that wasn’t weird enough. It had already happened more than once that Tony had lost track of whatever meeting they were in, because he had been busy looking at Loki. Wondering what he might be thinking about. Clearly not the meeting, Loki always looked a little bit lost in his own world, like everything around him wasn’t worth his attention.

Loki’s attention, Tony wanted it on himself. He wanted to sit down with him and do nothing but talk. Or nothing at all. Maybe stroke his hair. Tell him that it was pointless to chase after his father’s or his brother’s affection. Tony had been there and done that. It wasn’t worth the emotional turmoil. It was their loss. Good riddance. Tony wanted Loki to be happy, to smile and most importantly – Tony wanted to be responsible for it.

That had never happened before and to be honest Tony wasn’t quite sure what to call it. If he had to put a label on it, Tony would probably say that he was in love. And it would be the first time.

It was a beautiful disaster.


End file.
